Friday, November 4, 2011

hard morning

I am having a very hard morning with Juliet.  She is inconsolable and I just don't know what to do to help her. I love her so deeply and feel so sad and overwhelmed that she is often so unhappy. I finally put her in her crib in hopes that she would take an early nap and wake up feel rejuvenated. Mostly, I didn't  know what else to do. She has been screaming in her crib for 25 minutes and it breaks my heart. I devote every single day to meeting her needs and trying my best to play with her and care for her in a gentle way, but she is just not content so much of the time. If anyone has dealt with this before, I'd love to hear your advice or encouragement because I feel at a loss and so discouraged. I'm sitting at my laptop in tears and just feel overwhelmed.


Sometimes a nap is all it takes.  We have pushed "Restart" on the day and things are looking good.
Update 2: Yep, still looking good.  Whew. I can do this, after all.


  1. Any ideas on why she is so upset? Does she have all of her molars in yet? (I know from experience with Hannah, those are horrible to get in!! I can remember Hannah waking in the middle of the night and screaming and inconsolable. I ended up just sitting down on the floor and letting her just scream and run circles around the dining room table.. eventually, when the ibuprofen & orajel kicked in, she calmed down and came and layed with me on the floor.)

    I think it is great that you are taking a mommy "timeout" and just putting her in her crib, where you know she will be safe. Even if she didn't end up falling asleep, that was the best place for her. This is such a difficult age, because they can't communicate with you enough for you to understand why they are so upset. Try to take deep breaths and do your best to figure out what she is trying to tell you.. at this age, it could be sibling rivalry, teething, separation anxiety (even if you are only in the other room), sickness, etc.. But, it does get easier- PROMISE!

    You are doing an excellent job with both of your girls :)

  2. I dont have any advice for you but you are doing a great job with her. Just hang in there to get through the rough patches. Maybe Dad can come over and play with her for a bit so you can get a break?

  3. Jamie- She cries most of the time around Dad unless he is giving her Dots. (not Dad's fault at all, she cries around everyone) He is starting to distance himself from her when we go over there because she is so often crying and unhappy.

    Katie- I don't know if it's related to teething anymore or not. She has so many teeth already that I can't keep track! She doesn't wake up at night, though, which I'm guessing she would if it's teething-related?

    She did fall asleep after 30 minutes in her crib and has been asleep for 90 minutes so far.Hopefully she will wake up happy. (she still sleeps plenty, 11.5 hours at night and 2-3 hours during the day)

    It doesn't seem related to jealousy over Audrey at all - she never displays any anger toward her at all, and I try really hard to set Audrey aside and hold Juliet alone when she is having a meltdown.

    I feel like I'm just walking on eggshells all day waiting for her to melt down. She has probably 2 period of inconsolable crying per day (won't let me hold her, no distractions work) and then several periods of general crying/whining throughout the day. She does best when we are outside with other children to distract her, like at the park - the meltdowns and crying almost always happen at home or at my dad's house.

    I don't know what else to try since I feel like I've tried everything. I guess this too shall eventually pass.

  4. I would REALLY recommend starting to show her Signing Time videos. I know, I know, videos are bad and whatnot, but Sophie learned SO MUCH from them. She knows over 150 signs, and it's totally from that program. We tried flashcards, but the video really helped her learn a lot more/fast/better. It could be her molars, even if she's not waking at night, or it could be that she's upset about something and just can't explain what it is. Sophie was able to sign that her teeth were hurting her, or her tummy, or communicate whatever it was that was upsetting her because of all the signs she had. I really feel like we've had a lot fewer tantrums and a lot less frustration than others (which could be temperament, totally), but I feel that it's because Sophie has been able to explain what's upsetting her since she was very young. Just an idea to try. The videos are usually available at the library, but they are (IMO) worth buying. I'd recommend starting with Baby Signing time volumes 1-4. Glad to hear that the nap helped things!

  5. awh, naps are the best even for people at my age :)
    Lovely Little Rants

  6. This is probably not a suggestion that you are up to but what about putting her in "pre-school" a couple hours/ afternoon? You know she enjoys playing with other kids and getting out of the house. It might be good for BOTH of you.

  7. Not a bad suggestion, Jamie. I'll have to really think about it because my gut reaction of course is to say No, that I would miss her too much and so on.

  8. My LO sounds similar in temperament to yours, and I agree that the signing HELPS. She had colic/reflux/milk protein intolerant and a very high needs baby from the beginning. I got a couple free apps on my phone for baby ASL, and she picked up almost 7 words within a couple of days! I figured it was too late in the game to teach her SL since she is saying some words, but it's given her a great bridge to communicate better and be a bit happier.

    That all said, my heart goes our to you as I know just how difficult it can be. You are courageous for having more than one:)

  9. Typing in my phone...sorry for all of the grammatical errors.