Saturday, December 24, 2011

Christmas Eve

Everyone in my family is taking an afternoon nap except for me. Even though I'm probably the one who needs it the most! Isn't this always the way, though? Audrey is sleeping on me in the Ergo and won't tolerate being moved from this upright position, so there is no rest for me today. I am feeling weary after a lot of weeping and sorrow for my Mom. My eyes are baggy and swollen.  Thank you God for giving me a husband who holds me while I cry.

There is a hole in the fabric of our family this Christmas. A very, very big hole. I am hosting Christmas dinner at our house. My Dad, sisters, aunts, and cousins will all be here.  My mom was really good at hosting these sorts of things with such ease and comfort. I feel out of sorts. I am glad everyone is coming. Our house is big enough and I want it to fill it up with good memories. I think I even make a decent hostess. But I wish it were my Mom doing it instead. Thank you God for giving me a Mom who taught me how to love my family.

On the brighter side, we are going to church in a couple hours. Just like we always do. I'm glad my Dad will be coming. Afterward, we will be having our second annual Christmas Eve Sushi Dinner. What says California more than eating sushi on Christmas Eve? My dad and Christy will be joining us and hopefully it will become a new tradition. Thank you God for new traditions to help take the sting out of a hard season.

Santa found time to wrap some gifts for the girls this week, so we are ready to go for tomorrow morning. Of course the girls are too young to understand much but it will still be fun. Christmas is a lot more fun now that there are children to love, and to spoil a bit. We are a very fortunate family, and sometimes I feel overwhelmed with gratitude for having this much. This much to give, this much to love, this much health.  God, please protect my children and my husband and give them good health and safety.

Juliet learned how to go on the "big girl" swing today at the park. Gary taught her. That's what daddies are for, because mama was too afraid that she wouldn't hold on tight enough and would topple off. Thank you God for giving my daughter a father who teaches her how to be brave and try new things.

Thank you for these gifts.

1 comment:

  1. New traditions. Old memories. Sounds like you're helping everyone by taking the leading role. Mom would be proud.